i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
Come see our sink grown plant.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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