Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
