i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
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