need another drink. this is the easiest way
Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
True strength comes from lack of pants
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize