Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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