community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
do nipples grow back?
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
