i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Randomize
