hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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