i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
