Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Randomize
