You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
Randomize
