Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
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