It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
My liver just had a heart attack.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Randomize
