The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Randomize
