Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
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