just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
let's just say, the carpet matched the drapes. in colour and length.
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
