just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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