UPDATE: In a passionate fit of self love, I brought myself to orgasm under the moon on my 7th floor balcony, ejaculating between the rungs towards the ground.
Unfortunately, I did not realize that most of it would end up on the balcony below mine.
At least you don't cum in color.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
I will pee on everything he values.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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