3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
