Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
