Here's my recipe for happiness. Go get a pen. 1. smoke a bowl 2. put on explosions in the sky 3. take a bath. Do this for about 1 hour or until all your problems go away.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
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