I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
also, when i showed up he started talking to me and eventually asked me if the girls treated me well. i went on to talk about my sex life. he was talking about his secretaries.
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