She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize
