Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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