he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
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