marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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