let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
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