his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
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