she looked like the bat from fern gully.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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