32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
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her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
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It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
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