Why does Corona taste like a burp?
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
this hospital has no fireball
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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