I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
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