I smell stomach acid.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
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