i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
