Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Randomize
