was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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