my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
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