ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
How's work?
Spinning.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize