after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Randomize
