Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I have already put on my inside pants.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize