I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
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