Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
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Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
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Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
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