if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
