I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Randomize
