Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
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