Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
