i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize