I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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