he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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