Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Verdict: uncircumcised.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
